While waiting for the ferry to Alcatraz, I think I saw someone die.
Totally last minute, I decided to travel to San Francisco. By myself. I had traveled alone before, so I thought that it would be no problem to wander the streets with my little guide book and fold out map. I had a great time, don't get me wrong. I just found that I don't crave that solitude as much as I used to in my younger days.
The day I arrived, I walked up one of San Francisco's quintessential hills to see the best view of the city. Not only was it completely overcast, it was raining, and, for the life of me, I couldn't manage to take a picture that was in focus. I thought maybe it was me that was out of focus.
You can get easily lost in your own thoughts when you don't have anyone to talk with. That makes it sound depressing, like I was longingly watching people, wishing I had someone to talk to. It wasn't like that. It was more contemplative and reflective with certain things that I wish I could have shared.
Waiting in line in the rain is never fun, but waiting in line in the rain alone might be worse. Now, I said that I think I saw someone die. It wasn't as dramatic as that might have sounded. No one was really aware, but a man collapsed as he was getting on the ferry. I didn't realize it until the paramedics came, but then, yes, I saw him laying on the ground with his shirt wide open while they tried to resuscitate him.
What shocked me the most was the gaping of the "audience". Truthfully, I couldn't believe so many people were standing around watching as if it were a play or something. I was guilty of it too. I started to just watch the onlookers. Most were concerned, some were indifferent. But practically everyone stood and watched. The man's wife or daughter or sister, I'm not sure which, was sitting on the side with an employee, crying. I couldn't stop myself from imagining this happening to me. What if I were traveling and my companion dropped dead? To go from being with somneone, being a part of a relationship, being safe and secure to being alone and in pain...
There's the rub. Being a part of someone else's life, being partners, being many instead of one is a fleeting thing. In one second you can be completely alone again. Are we ever not aloe? We are all just drifting through the universe on our own course which sometimes happens to orbit around the bright star of loved ones. But how permanent is it all?
TO BE CONTINUED>>>>>
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